122320

Have been so busy. I'm tired. 

121520

Good good good. Much yes. Very happy. 

121120

I've been writing, drawing, playing my guitar. Started back to work, it's really quiet. They're partially shutting us down again but we're not losing any hours. Haven't been overeating. Things are pretty good and I'm not used to it. Lots more to say but who's reading this, anyway. 

120120

So I got 15/100 pages of my novel. There's like a foot or so of snow, all since last night. I'm really struggling. Kenzie is such an asshole, I don't even want to get into it. I got cleared to go back to work but I honestly don't know if I'm ready for it emotionally, but whenever they want to put me on the schedule I'll be there. Set the tree up. Bought some stuff I will need/will enjoy. Trying to get in the spirit because I'm seriously depressed with this single mom shit. He's awesome, I'm shit. Mom and dad take care of him more than me and mom still does more around here than she reasonably should. And I can see it taking a toll and it kills me. Then all the drama with Kenzie's fucking rights. And I'm just so stressed out I want to run away. I've been crying. And I know it'll be rewarding when I get things more under control but I feel so worthless right now. 

112120

It's been kinda crazy. First, my youngest niece had to get tested. It was positive, so her parents and sisters got tested. My brother and sister in law are positive, the girls were negative. Then my other brother tested positive. Thought my parents, the baby and I would have to get tested but they said without symptoms not to because there's a limited amount of tests. Then today, my mom was talking on the phone and started crying like crazy. The older of my brothers went to the hospital because he couldn't breathe. We were so scared. They did a couple tests and gave him a steroid and prescription for an inhaler. Told him to go back if it got worse. I'm still very concerned about everyone. I've been praying. I really hope everyone gets better and nobody else gets sick. 

111120

I'm struggling. But I'm doing my best to fight through it. It's been unseasonably warm lately, but that seems to be over. My thoughts are a bit scattered. I've been writing every night, although not as much as I need to in order to get a novel out by the end of the month. But that's okay, too. The world is strange. 

110120

Got to come home on my birthday. It was the best ever. Didn't do much yesterday. Today, kenzie and his mom came over for a while. It snowed a bit. Have a few appointments this week. Going to participate in nanowrimo. Today, Neil is two weeks old. I hope I'm good enough to be his mom. I'm trying to get better.